I’ve worked with a lot of people to quit smoking. In doing this, I have heard all kinds of reasons that it might be better if they kept smoking.

I’ve been told smoking sharpens your mind, relaxes you, calms you, keeps you from yelling at the kids (or spouse), tastes good with coffee, tastes better after a meal. In short, makes you feel “better”. (I always ask “better than what”?)

I know you don’t completely believe these reasons, or why know you should quit smoking. I also know a part of you DOES believe these things, and more.

A part of you MUST believe your reasons or you would have quit smoking by now. Now may be a good time to know there are no laws that say your reason to keep smoking has to make sense. They rarely do.

Almost all of the reasons you continue smoking can easily be proven wrong. Example: Maybe smoking helps you relax during work breaks because you get away and go outside to do it.

And most of the time you’re AWARE it doesn’t make sense. That doesn’t change anything though, does it? Just one more log to toss on the fire of your motivation to quit. A fire that doesn’t have much chance against the ocean of your craving to smoke.

It’s basically about two things. The motivation that smoking will make you feel better and the feeling that you’re trying to feel better than. That is all.

If you’re too hot, you look for ways to cool off. If you’re leg hurts you look for pain relief. If you feel bad (tired, stressed, overwhelmed, angry, lonely, whatever…) you look to feel good. If you have held the belief that smoking makes you feel good, that’s where your mind takes you.

This is an only slightly simplified explanation of a craving. Most smokers have more than one type of craving like, the ‘first thing in the morning’ craving feels different than the ‘after lunch’ craving. But the same model applies.

So how to help this situation? I can spend a few articles explaining it (and I have, look for them) But, it comes down to changing the feelings, motivations and beliefs involved.

First, the ‘bad feeling’ side of things needs to be addressed. If it’s too much stress, get it managed, if it’s a situation that makes you lonely, do what you can to fix it, or look for help.

Second, the belief that smoking makes you feel good (it is often the mistaken, and understandable, belief that smoking equals being an adult, in control, strong, capable, etc…) The fact is, smoking is some plant leaf and chemicals wrapped in paper. The good feeling you’re looking for, and sometimes experience, is created by YOU. YOU make yourself feel better when you smoke. You can make yourself feel just as good when drinking a glass of water. If, your mind believes it.

And that’s the trick. Quit smoking is mainly about modifying behavior. That’s why the success rate of medication and nicotine replacement alone is so poor. The only current exception is Chantix and even Pfizer, the makers of Chantix, recommend behavior modification along with the medication.

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