Great relationships don’t just happen. Both partners should work to make it happen. And “work” is the right term, since it’s not always easy and smooth sailing. Even when you deeply love each other, there are times when you will be at loggerheads. This is normal. But you can strive to keep a clean slate, so that the disagreements don’t pile up and cause deeper problems in your relationship.

The best thing to do is to first discuss the things that are the most common sources of disputes (this includes sex, money and kids) before these issue start to crop up. Because you have already talked about these, you already know how these issues should be addressed, which is difficult to think about when you are in the middle of a fight.

Here are a few things you can do to ward off relationship problems even before they rear their ugly head:

Communication is key. Talk is definitely not cheap when it comes to strengthening relationships. When partners talk about their thoughts and share what they feel with their partner, it opens up avenues by which you can forge deeper ties. Sometimes, because of the everyday business of life, partners fail to communicate. Schedule appointments by which you can talk with each other. And when you are communicating, set some rules for you to follow. Don’t generalize – avoid using the words “you always” or “you never”.

Make time for some lovin’. The sexual aspect of your relationship should never be taken for granted, no matter how busy you are. Again, set a date for this – you will find your excitement and anticipation building up as your “date” draws near. Of course, you should also be open to spur-of-the-moment things. The main thing is that you enjoy each other.

Agree about Finances. Work out a budget together – include savings. Discuss how monthly bills are to be settled. Give each other “space” – there should be a certain amount that each one can spend at his or her discretion. Be honest with each other about your debt and income. Agree about short-term and long-term goals for the family.

Household chores assignments. Each partner should have a specific set of responsibilities around the house. As much as possible, these responsibilities should be evenly divided (to be fair) so that no resentment can crop up.

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